Maher: "Childish" To Pretend Decline In Crime Has Nothing To Do With Electing A "F Around And Find Out President"
https://www.realclearpolitics.com/video/2026/09/26/maher_childish_to_pretend_decline_in_crime_has_nothing_to_do_with_electing_a_f_around_and_find_out_president.html

Bill Maher addressed bipartisanship and a drop in crime in America in a monologue on this week's edition of "Real Time" on HBO.

BILL MAHER, HBO, 'REAL TIME' HOST: Finally, New Rule, it's not a crime when people from opposing parties work together for the good of the American people, and it shouldn't be a scandal if they talk to each other. Democratic House leader Akeem Jeffries recently met with Jared Kushner, and as often happens, he was treated as a collaborator. Yeah, that's what democratic government is, collaboration.

But bipartisanship is such a dirty concept now that we can only practice it in secret like how Republicans do with homosexuality. I know it's hard to believe, but we used to actually celebrate it. Democrats and Republicans would sign bills together, all smiles, and then crow about the victory and how working together made it happen.

They'd use dozens of pens to sign the bill so they could hand them to each other, and then they'd say, we disagreed on plenty, but today America won. Now if you handed a pen to someone from the other party, they'd take it and stab you in the neck like Joe Pesci in Casino. This is what government used to look like.

Here's what it looks like now. Meeting with the other side, but having to hide your face behind office supplies. Can anyone really imagine Mike Johnson and Hakeem Jeffries clasping hands today? Boo! Get a room, pussies. How dare you come together in a place called Congress?

Congress has a 16% favorability ranking, and one reason is, even when they do something good, no one's bragging about it on the campaign trail. Because working with the other side is sus. Compromise? That's for a**holes. Real leaders, real leaders fight!

GOV. WALZ: That's how we're gonna fight!

GOV. DESANTIS: I will fight for you!

SEN. ELIZABETH WARREN: You don't get what you don't fight for!

SEN. CRUZ: We'll always fight!

REP. MACE: Fight like hell!

TRUMP: Fight, fight, fight!

REP. OCASIO-CORTEZ: Are you ready to fight?

MAHER: Hulk fight! Good news stories get buried because they're tainted by cooperation. Every issue is like that. Take drugs. I know I do. Well, I've never hidden the fact that I like drugs and I've smoked my share of weed. And your share. And yours. And I will admit, the weed is stronger these days. I just found out the new TV show I've been enjoying lately is actually Roku City.

But here's what's crazy. The progress we've made in the last few years in both street drugs and prescription drugs is truly phenomenal, and no one's talking about it. Deaths involving fentanyl are down 55% from their peak. Cocaine, down 37%. Heroin, 89%. There's been a 34% decrease in meth-related deaths, which has led to a 64% increase in teeth.

What happened? It's not like Americans suddenly became a people who make good decisions. Well, part of it is reasons beyond politics. That's true. Heroin, for example, lost a lot of its appeal now that people can shoot Ozempic to get skinny.

But mostly it's because Democrats did some things and Republicans did other things. And by not actually ever working together, they stumbled upon positive change. Or as Trump put it, it was all me. That's what he said. He said Biden did absolutely nothing.

Well, actually, Biden did do something. He had great success with this issue because he made Narcan more easily obtainable. What is Narcan? I don't know. What I do know is when a person used to be overdosing and about to croak and had like a minute to live before they died, the way we used to handle it was John Travolta would stick a needle in your tit.