the last drops of life
seem to be draining
from somewhere deep within the layers of my soul,
and still,
giving up is not an option.
when all my thoughts & brain cells
are screaming,
clawing at one another,
I soothe myself in silence.
when I refuse to sleep,
the night comes after me & leaves its shadow
beneath my eyes.
when my eyes burn & sting
like a salt sea
filled with tears
that never quite arrive,
I brush a hand across them
and carry on.
the remedy for this weariness
is neither sleep
nor rest.
it is an ending.
the moment
all of this is finally over.
and then
I'll be a bird
in the open sky,
a fish
in the endless ocean,
and for the first time in a long while,
I'll breathe.
- HST . hot summer night,
mid-July, 2026