life with bek

Sheffield, England. 21:18.

It’s been a week since I moved to England. I really thought I’d feel more different.

Instead, I’ve mostly been doing very normal things. Buying groceries. Figuring out buses. Cooking. Walking around Sheffield with Google Maps open even when I’m pretty sure I know where I’m going.

Sometimes I still catch myself thinking, wait, I actually live here now. That’s probably the strangest part that I haven't been able to get off my head.

For years, England was somewhere I always wanted to go. A place from football matches. Now it’s somewhere I wake up every morning.

I really do miss home, especially the little things. Hearing my family in the next room. Knowing exactly where everything is. Eating something without having to read the label first. Being around people who have known me long enough that I don’t even have to explain myself.

Here, everything is new, including me.

I’m still figuring out what my life looks like when nobody is watching over my shoulder. Maybe that’s what I came here for.

It’s only been a week.

I still don't know these streets by heart. I still look at the map. I still sometimes wake up and remember that I'm far from home.

But tomorrow I'll wake up here again.

And maybe, little by little, this strange place will stop feeling like somewhere I came to.

It will just be somewhere I am.

Orzular orzuligicha qolmas)

Kimda qanday mavzular bor?

Kitob o'qigan hamda o'qimagan insonni ajratib bera olaman deyishsa buni umuman iloji yo'q deb kular edim. Mana hozir o'zim yozayotgan ushbu matnlarni o'qib ko'rib qanchalik so'z boyligim kamligini va yozish qobiliyatim yetarlicha rivojlanmaganini ko'rib yuqoridagi fikrga qo'shildim.

Kitob foydali baribir.

O'z o'zi bilan gaplashish.

Men bilgan eng 'underrated' odatlardan biri aynan shu self-talkdir. Barcha narsani yaxshi va yomoni bo'lganidek bu odatning ham o'ziga yarasha oqibatlari bordir.

Ko'p hollarda ko'chada o'zi bilan o'zi suhbatlashadigan odamni uchratib qolsak, ahmoqga, jinniga chiqaramiz. O'zi bu odat yaxshimi yoki yomon?

Bu siz uni qay holatda ishlatayotganingizga, hamda nima deb gaplashayotganingizga ham bog'liqdir. Tadqiqotlarga ko'ra agar ushbu odat to'g'ri foydalanilsa, o'zingiz bilan gaplashishni ham katta foydalari bor ekan.

Afsuski, inson tabiati salbiy taraflama o‘z-o‘zi bilan gaplashishga moyil bo‘lib, “Men hech narsani uddalay olmayman” yokida “Men omadsizman” kabi umumlashtiruvchi fikrlarni keltirib chiqarib bo'layotgan vaziyatni battar chigallashtirishga organganmiz.

O'zingiz bilan suhbatlashish doimo fikrlaringizni bir joyga yeg'ib olishga, har qanday ishni uddalay olishingizga va siz hech qachon yolg'iz emasligingizga undash uchun qo'l kelishi mumkin.

2/30

Ta'lim olish manzili muhimmi?

Bunday sarlavhani o'qib hayron qolgan bo'lsangiz kerak. Albatta muhimda, bo'lmasa chetda o'qish kimga zaril bo'lardi degan qarshi fikrni berishingiz mumkin.

Fikrga qo'shilishga ham, norozi bo'lishga ham yetarlicha asoslar mavjud. Bir necha manbalarimdan maqolalar o'qigandan so'ng shu fikrga keldim.

Nega muhimligi:
- tashqi muhit
- ustozlar tajribasi
- imkoniyatlar

Nega muhim emas:
- barchasi o'zingizni qo'lingizda.

Ha birgina fakt qolgan 3 ta fikrga qarshi chiqa oladi. Siz kelajakda muvaffaqiyatli inson bo'lib yetishishingiz qayerda o'qiganligingizga emas, balki qanday ishtiyoqda, bilimga chanqoq bo'lib o'qiganingizga bog'liqdur. Bu fikrni berish ham bir tomondan noto'g'ri, chunki bizni qo'limizda bo'lmagan ko'plab omillar ham mavjuddir.

Hali o'zim ham yetarli tajribaga ega bo'lmaganim uchun ko'p yoza olmadim, lekin bu mavzuga nasib 5-6 yillardan so'ng yana qaytamiz.

Sizningcha muhimmi?

Yozish.

Yozish men uchun har doim qiziq mashg'ulot bo'lib kelgan. Bo'lsin u turlicha esselar, yoki-da xayolimdagi turli xil o'ylar. Oldinlari ko'p yozib turar edim, ammo negadir orada to'xtab qoldim. Keling ushbu odatni yana qaytaramiz.

Yozish uchun mavzularingiz bo'lsa izohda qoldirib keting.

#Volunteensback

@volunteensuz

Ona qarang odamlar ucha olar..

End of another chapter

Shuncha vaqt, shuncha mehnat.

- uhlamasdan kechalari sohani o'rganib chiqqanimiz
- hisobi yo'q filelar soni
- yuz soatlab qilingan meetinglar
- 2x Claude Pro subscriptions
- Getting to know our history more
- Madhiyani qayta yodladik, she'rlar yodladik, bayrog'imizni o'rgandik

Every single effort just to make it happen.

Hope everything will work out In shaa Allah. Sababini qildik, endi uyog'i Allahdan. I really hope I will never get to open these files again.

I hate those who are ashamed to be proud of Uzbekistan and those who hate it for no reason. Declare it publicly mf. The whole world is recognizing your country as one of the most rapidly-developing countries in the world.

17 today.

You get older, the cake gets smaller, and somewhere along the way it just becomes another day.

Had a lot at 16. Not in a way I can neatly summarize, actually. Just a lot of things happening, a lot of figuring out, a lot of moments where I didn't know how it was going to go and then it went anyway. Some of it worked out in ways I didn't expect. Some of it didn't work out at all.

I lowkey feel like I actually lived this year instead of just passing through it. One of the best years so far, Alhamdulillah!

17 starts now. And I have a feeling we're all going to remember it.

19th of April. 23:55

Not a bad day. Woke up at around 8. Not very proud but okay. Went to Soqoq. Don’t really want to talk abt that. Couldn’t go to the exam for some reason(Mom didn’t allowed.)

Didn’t study at all. Hate it so much. At least only Eyuf essay left to submit till like friday. Then I am good to go with ts.

Will try to wake up at 5 tomorrow, In sha Allah.

May Allah increase me in knowledge, rabbi zidni ilma. Ameen.

18th of April. 23:08

Today was quite productive. Woke up very early, probably at around 5:40. Prayed Fajr and had a cup of tea, then headed straight to my exam. It was quite easy; not expecting anything below 70 from every section, In shaa Allah.

Then I went to have lunch at Belissimo, where I ended up staying till 6 till my lesson. Did the homeworks and went to the lesson. Almost fell asleep during the class but forced myself to get up everytime. So I think it is good for today, at least didn't spend hours on scrolling. Prayed 5 times, which is the most important one. Alhamdulillah for another blessed day. Now will be preparing for tomorrow's exam.

May Allah increase me in knowledge and help me to pass the exam with the highest marks. Ameen)

16th of April.

Its been over 2 weeks since I have started my SAT. I have promised myself to do all the homeworks myself, not using any AI. I broke my promise but do i give up? No.

Rabbi Zidni Ilma. May Allah increase me in knowledge, In shaa Allah.

I have no idea what to write about. I have always wanted to become a good writer. To become a reader. I did nothing to pursue my dreams tbh. Hope this challenge will get me to a better position in life.

Ameen.

Channel created