New to asexuality, need some insights, thank you

Hello everyone, I just looked up this sub because I need some insights. Asexuality has never occurred to me as something I might have, until now.

I'm a woman in my mid 20s , currently in a happy relationship (I'm gonna go into a bit of details here because they're relevant to my quetion). We've been together for almost a year but we haven't had sex. We kiss and make out a lot and I can tell my bf is really into it and wanna do more but I never have the urge to get to the penetration part. My bf thankfully is understanding and never questions me or pushes me into doing anything I'm not "ready" for. "Ready" is the word I use, but I feel like I will never actually be ready, as in I have no urge at all. I'm also not that thrilled about being eaten out, even tho my bf insists on doing it to pleasure me, bless him but I feel bad seeing him try and I just don't feel anything :(

I love my bf very much and I'm very attracted to him. I enjoy kissing and touching him tho I do realize my...fascination for his private part is more of a curiosity than anything sexual, if that makes sense? Sometimes I do have an urge to actually have sex but once we start making out I just don't feel like going any further. (I enjoy the makeouts but I just wanna stop there). I tell myself I'm just gonna let him penetrate me next time because I really really want to take this step but once we are there my mind is just meh about it. I'm so confused!!

I do pleasure myself too, tho not very frequent, and I never feel like I reach anywhere pleasurable. I'd be done masturbating when I'm "halfway" there. If I watched porn I do feel turned on just a tiny bit and then it's gone.

By typing these out I feel like I got my own answers, but if you've read this far, thank you and please leave any insights you might have. Am I asexual?

https://redd.it/1x75g9w
@asexualityonreddit