CFI training - completely unmotivated :(

I’ve been working on my CFI and gosh I feel like the biggest idiot to ever exist. I’ve done all my training part 61, with 3 dif instructors (loved them all) and doing CFI with a 4th rn (all at the same flight school). He’s basically the only instructor who does CFI initial training at my flight school, and a recommendation by him would almost def lead to me being hired by the flight school. I’m not looking to do it anywhere else because I want to get hired at this school. I don’t jive with him as well as I did with my previous instructors, but he’s been instructing about 20 years so definitely very skilled and knowledgeable guy.

Not that the rest of my training has been easy, but it’s all been relatively straightforward. CFI feels like a completely new ball game and I just feel like I’m going about the whole process wrong. I’m working on the FOI written rn - will be taking the test in a week or 2.

He says he usually does about 40 hrs+ of ground with students before the checkride, but how can I make these worth my time? It feels like every ground session is him dumping info on me. I bought backseat pilot, but how is the best way to study all this, and cram all this knowledge in and not forget any of it all? I’m definitely far out from a checkride date so I’m not sure how to learn all these lessons and retain the info for such a long time? I read the whole FAQ as well and I’m just struggling with how to actually go about studying all this.

It’s hard because I genuinely think I’ll enjoy being a CFI, but I feel such a mental barrier with this training that I am dreading every ground session I have with him. I also have 2 other jobs outside of this and life has just been really hectic. Any help is greatly appreciated, thanks for reading <3

https://redd.it/1x6sob4
@r_aviation