#IELTS Writing: Simplicity or complexity?

I often recommend IELTS writers aiming for 7.5+ to add complexity to their writing—complexity of both ideas and language.

And I often take flak for that. Many IELTS trainers and examiners recommend otherwise.

But let's drill deeper into what simplicity and complexity might look like in an IELTS essay. Compare the two excerpts below.

Topic: It is the responsibility of schools to teach children good behavior in addition to providing formal education. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

1️⃣

"First and foremost, the ideas of what constitutes good behavior vary widely. As a result, the behavior that is taught at school might be different from what parents teach at home. For example, teachers might discourage any questions in class. However, parents might encourage asking questions because they believe this improves creativity."

2️⃣

"First and foremost, the ideas of what constitutes good behavior vary widely. As a result, what is included in the curriculum or the code of conduct might be in conflict with what the student’s family believes to be appropriate. For example, teachers might enforce discipline in class by discouraging any questions or deviations from the laid-out procedures. A child’s parents, however, might encourage questions and rule breaking because these are considered to be signs of creativity and free thinking in the family."

Do you honestly believe the first answer would get a higher score than the second one?

I see quite a lot of writing that is similar to that in the first excerpt—there aren't any mistakes in it, and the ideas are good, but it's just ... too simple. So, yeah, I believe in complexity, guilty as charged.

At the same time, complexity mustn't come at the expense of meaning, style, and readability. Writing something like this is probably not the best idea:

3️⃣

"First and foremost, the ideas of what constitutes good behavior vary widely, resulting in a situation when the tenets encapsulated in the curriculum or the code of conduct do not cohere with the dogmas the student’s family not only believes to be appropriate but also tries to intrench indelibly. For example, teachers might enforce discipline in class by discouraging any questions or deviations from the laid-out procedures, while a child’s parents might encourage inquiry, probing, and anarchical demeanor owing to the fact that these are considered to be signs of creativity, ingenuity, and fecundity in the family."

Complexity is better than simplicity, but balance is king. 👑

#ieltswritingtask2