😔😀😒😟😀😒🙁😔

The bright sun dazzles the eyes, the grass underfoot pleasantly tickles the heels, light gusts of warm summer breeze caress the face, and Osamu closes his eyes. He puts his hands behind his head and sighs softly, smiling.

Good.

Dazai is lying on a checkered blanket, squinting contentedly. He listens to the rustling of the green foliage, the chirping of birds, who are talking about something of their own on the high branches. It’s so warm and peaceful around him that he doesn’t want to open his eyes at all.

— Do you like it, Chuya? — Osamu says quietly, without opening his eyes.

— I’m dead.

— No, no, Chu, what are you saying? — Dazay laughs.

— I’m dead.

— Chuya?— He turns his head and opens his eyes.

Something terrifying is looking at him, completely unlike his Chuya. This creature has empty eye sockets from which black liquid is oozing, white, dry skin and lips, and a repulsive, rotting bullet hole in its forehead. It’s breathing heavily, wheezing.

— I’m dead.

Dazay is overcome by a clammy, primal fear; he instantly jumps to his feet and backs away, while the creature turns its head unnaturally toward him and stretches out its bony arms.

— No, no, no… Chuya!

Tears well up in his eyes; Osamu tries to move, but he can’t. Osamu tries to take a breath, but he can’t. The traumatized mind doesn’t allow for a break. At first, it protects itself with pleasant memories, creating an ideal world where a loved one is nearby, where it’s warm and peaceful. But the subconscious can’t deceive itself for long. Reality breaks through the illusion in its most terrifying form — as a rotting corpse with a bullet hole in its forehead. This isn’t just a monster. This is the truth that Dazay can’t accept.

— Bring a sedative! — it sounds as if it’s coming from beneath a thick layer of water, — Hurry!

Dazay feels his body go limp, and he falls into the void.

Chuya died a year ago from an enemy bullet.
Dazay didn’t manage to save him.
Chuya comes to Dazay in the form of hallucinations.
Dazay is in a psychiatric hospital.
Chuya will never leave him.
Dazay has suffered a trauma that will never go away.